Pretty much to most all of the above. Visibility and word of mouth go a long ways....the likes of TIG pimping a game a time or so on the main page, likewise RockPaperShotgun, Bay12 forums, SomethingAwful, TalkingTime somewhat----these get the word out and tend to snowball. I've surely thought that LambdaRogue along with the likes of MageGuild, Triangle Wizard, and Ragnarok/Valhalla simply are not as "big" as they SHOULD be due to the above combined with the little communal lightbulb just not dinging "on" for some damn reason. Particularly Valhalla/Ragnarok as, barring some technological issues(?), is one of the Angband/Nethack era oldies that got quite a boost back in the day but then fell off the map before the big Internet Boom. I mean, at least a "uLarn" makes so much sense and add that one to the "should be big" list assuming the development remains as brisk and successful as it has thus far.
Otherwise, getting on every possible platform, polishing most every aspect(perhaps forming a team, though it'd really depend, to wrangle the big issues actively as Stone Soup tends to) and growing as things come up is about all that can be done. The other path though, one I never see talked about here, is for a developer to be a bit more strategic in what their game springs from aside from "just" language choice and whatnot. In the not incredibly distant future, for example, seemingly, the likes of Chaosforge/Neko(especially), Dwarf Fortress to an extent in this regard, and the whole Doryen thing(unless things just implode somehow) will be essentially "on fire" in terms of awareness/hype and all else. As such, and in keeping with the laws of nature, it is far easier and usually more dramatic to serve as an accelerant to an ongoing fire than to necessarily luck out on the means and knowhow to start up a blaze oneself.