Sorry, but this is not interesting to read. It is generic and boring without any "soul", and after a few turns you will recognize the patterns a text is built of.
Good IF should have sool and unique writing, style, atmosphere. This is why I don't play MUDs anymore, but stick with real IF, because esp. the newer ones are more literature than game. I agree, however, that many players might play a generic singleplayer RL-MUD.